I assure you:
Ignoring your husband WILL get his attention.
The question is:
Is it the KIND of attention you want?
Will it fulfill your secret wish – to get his appreciation, love, and affection back?
Because whether you admit it or not – that’s what you really want.
Even if you think you just want to teach him a lesson, to hurt him back.
When you look a little deeper inside – you know what you really want is for him to appreciate you, to support you, to romance you, to love you.
What if there is a better way to get his attention? What if this way will make you a happier person?
In this post, I would like to offer you an alternative.
It will still involve ignoring your husband – but with a “twist”.
Would you like to know what it is?
Ignoring Your Husband – Does it Work?
Let’s see the pros and cons of ignoring your husband to get his attention:
Ignoring your spouse, or giving him the silent treatment – obviously cannot be ignored.
There’s no way he won’t notice you are not talking to him and treating him like he doesn’t exist.
It’s an easy way to get him to realize that he has hurt your feelings.
After all, if you don’t react in some way – how will he know that he has done something wrong?
And whether he shows it or not – he WILL be upset about it.
(👉 See the 14 best being ignored quotes)
So if you want to teach him a lesson – there’s no doubt he’ll learn it.
But before you go and use the cold shoulder classic, here are the downsides of ignoring your husband to get his attention:
1. Cold shouldering in the long term can be toxic for your marriage. If there is no communication – there cannot be a true bond between two people in a relationship.
2. Ignoring your spouse will, at some point – make him angry. His ego will be hurt, and he may want to continue the circle of negativity by ignoring you back or hurting your feeling even more.
3. This silence between the two of you may have a very negative impact on your children if you have any. They’ll notice it and may become highly stressed about it.
4. Lack of communication may cause your husband to interpret your behavior in the wrong way. He may think that the reason for it is not the one you meant.
The good news is:
There’s an alternative.
A healthy way to ignore your husband – which will not only get his attention faster but will make YOU feel better – immediately.
Here’s the Right Way to Get His Attention
Here’s the deal:
What you have to ignore is your husband’s NEGATIVE behavior towards you.
At the same time, you have to focus on and highlight ANY positive behavior or actions towards you.
This is an “inside job”.
All of this is done in your mind. It’s not external. You choose how to react NOT towards him – but in your mind.
Here’s an example:
Your husband just criticized you or judged you?
You ignore it. You acknowledge, for a second, how you feel about it, and then you put a stop sign. No thoughts about this are allowed.
On the other hand:
Your husband woke up, said “good morning” and smiled?
You highlight it. You focus on it for a few minutes. In your heart, you feel gratitude.
Use the well-established spiritual (and these days – also scientific) laws of the universe:
What you focus on – grows.
What you ignore – disappears.
👉Here’s what to do when your husband ignores You
What Happens When You Only Ignore His Negative Behavior?
Don’t mope around the house feeling unwanted, undesirable, neglected, and unappreciated.
When you do that, you will only attract more thoughts to prove it, and the same thoughts will create the same feeling – forever.
And if you look for it – you’ll find it. I assure you.
Take some actions to show yourself how much you love yourself.
(Who can resist someone who loves herself?)
Focus on things you enjoy.
Take him out of the picture, mentally, for a few weeks or a month.
I have done this many times in my life, and not just with my husband.
And if I stick to it, and monitor my thoughts, and how they lead me to the same feelings and actions – and decide to focus on my future instead of the past – I always get what I want.
When you radiate happiness and wholeness, without depending on ANYONE else to feel it – you become irresistible.
He will admire you.
And the best part?
He won’t be able to remain in his low frequency for long.
Higher frequency always lifts lower frequency around it.
It’s just a law of nature.
But you’ll have to try it. You’ll have to do it, and you’ll have to stick to it.
There’s a little voice inside you, all the time, telling you:
– Renee Wade, thefemininewoman.com
I don’t know if you’ll agree with me, but I truly believe I’ve found the best way to get your spouse’s attention.
It’s a positive way, instead of a negative way.
It will reduce the stress in your life, instead of amplifying it when you have to ignore your husband (and insist on being mad at him, or hurt by him).
If you do it the right way and stick with it – you’ll become a happier person, and this joy and love for life won’t depend upon what he said, did, or didn’t do.
When you are happy, and whole – everyone will fall in love with you. Including your husband. 🙂
What do you think? Do you agree? Disagree?
Let me know in the comments below.
Rooting for ya,
I have been trying this technique for one week, and I think it might be helping, but I have one question about it. When I try to ignore him for saying something mean, it seems to work, but when I try to ignore him for saying something stupid, my mind can’t get away from thinking HE is stupid. It isn’t helping my marriage to think of him as a stupid buffoon. How can I ignore his stupid comments in the same neutral way? Any advice would help a ton!
I have just found out that my husband is a serial cheater. He had to get a new phone and is no good with technology, To cut a long story short, I found he’s been messaging and meeting many women.
There have been many moments when I’ve wondered about his fidelity but, because I suffer from severe anxiety, he’s made me feel as though I’m unreasonably jealous. He is no longer interested in me and we have had sex once in the last 18 months though I have tried to instigate it – he says he’s stressed, tired or unwell.
I don’t feel as though I can talk to him at the moment because his dad is dying of cancer. Should I continue as though I’m in blissful ignorance and offer him all my love and support? I am still madly in love with him and desperately want things to work out but am scared that our entire relationship is a tissue of lies and I’ve been used.
Our brain is like a computer , we programmed it to react to a situation or behavior if the other person , we trained ourselves to react to a trigger.
But if it’s not helping and again and again you ate going to a cycle of fight , tears , blaming each other , getting back to each other SND still staying together , it is killing you !!
We have to reprogram the trigger ( only see the positive side !! And it will work . Promise !!
Stop reacting negatively and it will stop !!
It is true and it works ! Years of ignoring blaming each other , bad feelings over small things , living in the past …. concentrating on the weaknesses and fault of your husband has left nobody happy !!
I tried concentrating on his positive sides and yes there are many , and voila my marriage became so much better and my husband so much more appealing to me and my home a serene place !!
I will try this for about a month and see where it takes us
Adrienne Gabriel says
I think this is the best advice I have received by far. Thank you for giving me a positive outlook. I feel so much better already.
Hi I have tried all this, first by talking about the things he does and ends up getting angry, I tried the silent treatment and still nothing changed, we only drifted apart. I tried your method and things still remain the same, no changes made. I have decided to give it space by moving out for a while to see how things go
My husband is having an affair
Then leave him because its hell if you stay. I speak from experience.