Do you feel like you can’t do anything right these days?
Is your husband becoming increasingly annoyed and irritated over insignificant small things?
This post is all about what to do when your spouse is always irritated, annoyed, or angry.
It’s like walking on eggshells when you’re around him.
He is moody, critical, negative, snapping at you, and finally, you want to avoid seeing him altogether.
But don’t lose hope just yet.
There’s a simple solution to this problem, and it requires little to no action on your part.
No “working on the marriage”, no “let’s talk about our relationship”.
Want to know what to do?
Why Does Your Husband Get Angry Over Small Things?
The most important thing I want you to understand is that even though his irritation and dissatisfaction are directed at you – it has nothing to do with you.
Your husband is really annoyed with himself. HE is the one he is irritated with.
This is his way to express HIS profound personal unhappiness.
Since most of us are used to looking outside for someone else to blame when we feel like crap, your husband has found the easiest (and nearest) person to blame.
It’s you, of course.
To explain his misery, he is fixating on your every action and word and using it as an excuse for why he doesn’t like his life (and himself!) at this point.
But WHY is he depressed or Unsatisfied with his life?
There are literally hundreds of possible reasons for his personal unhappiness.
Maybe he grew up with critical and judgmental parents who made him feel nothing he does is good enough (sounds familiar?).
Maybe this led him to have unrealistic expectations of himself, his marriage, and everyone around him.
Maybe he is frustrated by wanting many things while believing he can never get them.
The point is, it DOESN’T matter.
No matter how much you love him and want to support him, there is nothing you can do about it.
👉 Related: Ultimatums in Marriage – Does it Work?
(Well, almost nothing, as you’ll see below)
HE is the only one that creates his own reality.
Here’s what I guarantee:
His irritability will be gone. His anger will subside. He will be able to see you – his wonderful wife and best friend – who he cannot see right now.
👉 Learn how to stand up to your husband and make him stop criticizing you with Mort Fertel’s free marriage help!
This leads us to the second question:
How to Handle an Angry Husband and Make it Stop?
There is only one thing you can do to get your loving husband back, and it requires no action on your part.
It only requires you to change the way you THINK.
It’s a law of nature:
The things you focus on – get bigger.
If you focus on his irritability and anger – I assure you it’ll get bigger.
On the other hand, if you focus, with all your might – on his positive attributes – you’ll witness more and more of them re-appearing – every day.
Here’s what to do:
1. Sit down for 3 minutes every day and write a list of things about him – that you are thankful for.
Here are a few examples:
- The children he has brought to this world with you.
- The way he can make you laugh. His heart-warming smile.
- The family that you’ve created together.
- The way he supports your family financially.
If you put your heart into it, you’ll find dozens of things.
2. Think back and remember all the fun times and the little amazing moments you had together. Remember the way he was there for you over the years.
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This is the REAL man you are married to. He is there, hiding somewhere underneath his depression and anger.
This man still loves you with all his heart.
Stick with these thoughts for at least 10 minutes every day.
And when you’re done, let it go.
And When He Gets Irritated With You Again?
When he gets irritated again, just ignore it. Think of it as an illusion. A dream. A TV show that isn’t real.
Accept it, but don’t take it to heart. It has nothing to do with you.
The only reality you accept from now on is the one on your list.
If you stick with it for 30 days, you may see the real, physical reality change in front of your eyes.
You’ll find yourself capable of seeing the real things that bother him.
👉 Read: My husband hates me: why and what can I do?
You’ll be able to encourage him to follow his dreams, and to do whatever he needs to be happy again. To love himself again (or maybe for the first time in his life).
You’ll be able to tell him that you believe he is a powerful man, capable of achieving anything he wants, and that he has no limitations.
And while you’re at it, tell yourself the exact same things.
And see him fall in love with you all over again.
And feel you fall in love with him all over again.
See your marriage renewed. See your children calmer. Happier.
Close your eyes.
Can you see it? Can you feel it?
Then it’s there.
How to Get Your Husband to Hear You
How do you get back to the place where you and your spouse care again?
The question you should be asking is NOT, “How do I communicate effectively with my spouse.” The question you should be asking is, “How do I connect with my spouse again?”
Here’s how to get your husband to talk to you (and listen)
Rooting for ya,